Psychodynamic Approach
What it means to look at patterns, feelings and relationships with curiosity.
Read MoreUnderstanding Repeating Relationship Patterns
A different relationship can still leave you with a familiar feeling. That repetition may be something you want to understand.
Rebecca Victor, LP-D
Questions That Matter to You
Understanding Repeating Relationship Patterns
A different relationship can still leave you with a familiar feeling. That repetition may be something you want to understand.
Recognizing something familiar
Perhaps you repeatedly feel overlooked, take responsibility for keeping the peace, or pull back just when a relationship becomes closer. You may recognize a pattern but not know what to do with that recognition. An article cannot explain your personal history. Therapy offers time to look at particular moments, the feelings around them, and what the pattern means in your own life.
Understanding is different from blaming
Looking at a pattern does not mean that every difficulty is your fault or that another person's behavior should be accepted. It means making room for the parts you can explore from your own experience. You might consider what you expect from others, what you find difficult to ask for, or how you respond when you are disappointed. Context matters more than a simple label.
The past can be part of the conversation
Rebecca's psychodynamic and psychoanalytic approach includes curiosity about earlier relationships and experiences. Connections may emerge gradually rather than arrive as a single explanation. You can disagree with an interpretation, say that something does not fit, or bring the discussion back to what is happening now. Therapy should leave room for those responses, not require you to accept a story that feels imposed.
Bring a small example
It can help to start with one recent conversation rather than a summary of every relationship. Maybe you walked away from an interaction with a general feeling of unease, anxiety or sadness, and you want to understand what happened. Or you might have specific questions like: What did you hope the other person would understand? What felt difficult to say? What happened afterward? These are possible topics for a session, not homework you must finish before contacting the practice. You can begin with the uncertainty itself if that is what you have.
Choosing the setting for the work
Some people want individual space to think about their relationships. Others want to attend couples therapy with a partner. Rebecca offers both, and the initial conversation can help clarify what you are seeking. A free 15-minute consultation covers fit and next steps. No change in a relationship or fixed treatment length is guaranteed. The work depends on your circumstances and the process you agree on together.
Frequently asked questions
Is noticing a pattern the same as a diagnosis?
No. A pattern is something to explore in context, not a diagnosis from a webpage.
Can we focus on my current relationship?
Yes. Current experiences can provide a starting point, with earlier experiences discussed when relevant.
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More About Working Together
Therapy for Men and Relationships
You may want a relationship to feel different without knowing how to change the conversations you keep having.
Read MoreCouples Therapy
For partners caught in a familiar pattern, or finding each other again after a change.
Read MoreA conversation about fit comes first.
Ask about a free 15-minute consultation. Onboarding follows only after you agree to try working together.